How Do You Ask Out a Girl Without Showing You Care?
by Wired Speed
Summary: "I don't know. How do you get whipped by a girl that doesn't even know you?" "If anyone could it'd be the honorable sir 'leaves the house with a duck's butt stapled on his head' over here." "Shut up." Modern au SasuHina side NaruTayu
1. Assembling the Team

Probably reads too similar to my bleach fic but also i'm way more comfortable in naruto verse and there's character/situation differences between the two so I wrote it anyway. If you have probs with that then your standards are too high to be reading my fanfiction anyways

"Y-You?! And H-Hinata?!"

"Shut up idiot. You want the whole neighborhood to hear you?"

"Woohoo." Tayuya says sarcastically, rolling her eyes as she wags her finger in a circle. "Nice going Sasuke, a plain meek girl like her is perfect for a dull toast guy like you."

Sasuke puts his hand through his hair. 'Why did I think these two idiots could help?'

"Plain toast? I always thought of Sasuke as like a raw tomato like something no one would ever eat.

"Pfft tomato is too nice. He's more like-"

'Damn Itachi's got to be on his honeymoon now of all times.'

Tayuya notices his deeper than usual frown. "Well if you didn't want our advice you shoulda asked someone else. I mean you got a legion of friends to ask- oh wait!"

Naruto puts his hand out for a high-five. "Oh! Tayuya! What would I do without you?"

She rolls her eyes but Naruto flashes her the puppy-dog eyes and she begrudgingly and pathetically delivers the high-five. Sasuke tired of their idiocy speaks up.

"You weren't even invited Tayuya."

"Well you're the only rich jerk I know whose stupid enough to open the door to Naruto so I figured you'd be dumb enough let me in your home too. As such I can watch my stories on your big screen tv while you two go have your girl talk."

Sasuke closes his eyes and points at the tv down the hall. "Just go."

"Seeya!"

She leaves the dining room and goes to the living room. Sasuke lets out a sigh, pleased that she's gone. He then sees out the corner of his eye and is greeted with the sight of Naruto pouting, with his chin on the table.

"I wanted to watch too."

Sasuke grits his teeth, feeling close to losing it. "I swear Naruto if you don't get serious for one second I will tell Jiraiya all about Tayuya's criminal record."

Naruto now sits up and starts leaning back in his chair. "Pfft like that'd be bad-"

"I'll tell Tsunade."

"...So tell me about this Hinamori girl." Naruto says as he now sits up straight.

"Its Hinata."

Naruto waves his hand. "Whatever just tell me more about her. Like what does she look like?"

"Remember that girl Kiba and Shino hang out with? The one in the white coat?"

"Wait the quiet one?"

"Yes."

Naruto eyes widen. "I though that that was a guy."

"..."

"Hey c'mon that's a really bulky jacket and besides what girl would ever hang out with Kiba! Like at least Shino showers regularly! "

So went the backstory of that time the affluent neighborhood the Uchihas resided in was greeted with the sight of the quiet Sasuke putting some punk in a scorpion hold on the front lawn for all to see.

][

"So what does that make it? Like 10,037 to 38?"

"Why is Naruto so much higher?"

"Cause I am beyond a 10."

Sasuke sinks deeper into the couch. "Just give me some advice before Naruto breaks out of the ropes."

Tayuya fakes picking food out of her teeth before responding. "I guess i'll overlook what you did to my boyfriend just this once and help, for like... 20,000 yen."

"2,000 yen."

"You don't play hardball with love Uchiha."

"I'll pay you if it works."

Tayuya wags her finger at him while she channel surfs with the other hand. She then faces away from completely and just looks at the tv. as she talks. "You mean when it works. So first off what's your current relationship with the girl?"

"Never talked to her. I doubt she knows me."

"You share a class with her?" Sasuke nods no. "Oh going a little exotic today I see. Describe her personality in two two words."

"Quiet, ...kind."

"First off you never talked to her so that kindness is probably an act. Don't push your luck just cause you're rich or think you're hot."

"You think i'm hot? Doesn't that give me more points over Naruto?"

"No I said /you/ think you're hot. And the fact you're still thinking about the scorecard just shows how petty you are. So work on hiding that until she's too invested in changing you to dump you."

"...I don't like change."

"Oh don't worry I know. One look of that hairdo you're 'sporting and I could tell you were a guy who doesn't believe in changes for the better."

"... It doesn't matter. Hinata isn't like those other shrieking idiots. She won't try to change me.

"Yeah yeah yeah she makes you feel tender in that dried out coal of a heart you have and you want to have four kids with her and a nice picket fence and yadda yadda. /snort/ You're so lame Sasuke."

"Well at least I wont be stuck taking care of your idiot's offspring in a few years. I can't imagine dealing with the combination of you two idiots.

"Well no cuz our kids would be rad badasses and you can't handle the idea of someone that cool." Naruto pops up from behind the couch, having escaped the ropes.

She slugs Naruto on his shoulder. "I cant believe you just said rad."

Sasuke snorts. "Well I couldn't believe Naruto could pick up a girl without bribing her. Looks like we were both wrong about him."

Tayuya looks down at her knees and shakes her head. She makes a fake chuckle before fully responding.

"Oh Sasuke I could crush you."

"...Wanna bet?"

And so went the backstory of that time the affluent neighborhood the Uchihas resided in was greeted with the sight of the quiet Sasuke being bodied by some punk's german suplex while some hooligan cheered in the background.


	2. Step 1: Establish Your Existence

"Hello Sasuke. Um can I help you with something?"

"No. I just ...wanted to say hello."

Sasuke says as he nods. Hinata just looks back at him and an awkward silence follows.

'Oh god this is painful, I am gonna kill those idiots.'

"Well okay. Uh see you later."

Sasuke tries to grip onto some kinda of detached coolness and respond.

"Yeah you too."

She walks off to the cafeteria and Sasuke just stands there. She turns a corner and a few seconds pass until-

"-schlurp- Yeah you too? Damn that was awful. Like maybe you were better off pining from afar if thats the kinda game you have."

Sasuke hands tense, as if to go right for the neck of the next person he see, as he turns he sees Tayuya there, sipping on a frappe without a care in the world.

"Tayuya you need to go."

Tayuya gives him a look that screams 'Yeah man sure'.

"Listen alright? My advice was solid. I said just walk by her down the hall and say hey. Like I expected you to not listen and say some stupid shit- and I even had an excuse to cover that but nah." She looks down at her cup and stirs the ice around with the straw. "You had to freeze up and say nothing. Like that was pathetic, like shame to your family bad!"

Sasuke closes his eyes. "You have ten seconds." He hears the click of her tongue followed by her fingers snapping.

5

4

3

2

1

Sasuke opens his eyes and goes to make a lunge until he notices she's gone. He looks to his left and right and thinking she's gone, sighs a breath of relief. He scratches the back of his.

"Great now what?'

"Oh Sasuke how sweet!"

Sasuke jumps and turns around and sees Ino, her hands clasped together resting below her cheek. Stars in her eyes.

"How sweet of you try to sneak a letter in my locker during lunch period!"

Sasuke jerks his head to the right and sees a locker with an assortment of floral stickers on it. He turns back to Ino.

"I gotta tell everyone about this! The whole school is gonna flip. But first-" her hands part and motions for a hug. She goes to say something else but Sasuke can't hear it. He has already turned and ran.

][

Naruto pokes his food with his chopstick. He grits his teeth at the cafeteria food.

"Man this stuff is rank."

"Well why don't you try to bring something from home."

"Listen Haku even someone as great as me has their limits and cooking is one of 'em. You can't be perfect at everything.

"Yeah the hard stuff like having manners, academics, knowing your right from your left-" says Tenten while rattling the subjects off her fingers.

Naruto pushes the tray aside "Okay you know what-"

"Oy dumbass. I don't keep my eye on you for eight hours and you're already macking with two babes? I'd be impressed if I wasn't too busy planning to disembowel you." She jerks her head in Haku's direction. "'Sup Haku."

"Hello Tayuya. Its nice to see you again."

Naruto lunges over and hugs Tayuya around the stomach.

"Ah Tayuya you came to see me! That's so sweet, I really am getting to you!"

Tayuya stays in the position for a brief moment until plying his hands off and taking a seat. Totally not blushing at Naruto's antics.

"Okay that's enough outta you." She turns to greet Tenten. "I don't believe we met, name's Tayuya."

Tenten nods. "Nice to meet you, I'm Tenten. So you're the famous Tayuya that our little Naruto gushes over. Its nice to fina- What the hell?"

A blue blur bolts through the double doors. Shoving it way throw the long cafeteria line. It vaults over a table and zig zags through the crowd until blasting through an exit door.

Naruto's table is stunned and what just happened. Trying to piece to together what they just saw. Tayuya folds her arms and looks at Naruto.

"Okay jackass what did you do this time?"


End file.
